- Non-Erotic Poetry
- An Ode To Unsolicited Dick Pics
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I am sure that I shall never see
A dick pic that arouses me
But I know that it impresses you
That I’m a real live female to send it to
You’re so sure this dick pic will have me impressed
That the moment I receive it you’re sure I’ve undressed
Dick pics may cause you to moan and to sweat
But their arrival on my phone is a sad thing to get
See penis might be the thing that turns your crank
But instead of a real message you’ve sent me this prank
Having a dick doesn’t make you one of a kind
If you want to stand out engage my mind
Make me laugh, have something witty to say
Talk about life, not just your need to get laid
Just having a dick doesn’t mean you’re owed a suck
Or a handjob, a tickle, a spank or a fuck
If your dick was truly the greatest thing in the land
You’d have partners lined up and you could retire your hand
Dicks are all average and weird and they all look the same
Nothing special unless candy shot out the last time it came
Having one isn’t unique, they hang from every dude
Sending me its pic isn’t just useless, it’s rude
Besides if all I need is something that points up in the air
I have a vibe for that, without the gross thatch of hair
- COMMENTS
Anonymousabout 1 year agoGood statement. Never sent one, but now I know not to. Truth be told, I’m 83, have ED so having enough for a picture is beyond me.
21stcvover 1 year agoI doubt that I will ever see
Erect dicks squirting pee,
Unless I grew to nine feet tall,
I'd never pee over that wall.
Apologies to Ogden Nash
