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Click hereI sat in the inevitable chair, right across the dressing cubicles. It was a bit of a wobbly chair. Every cubicle was in use.
I hate to go shopping with my girlfriend just as much as the next guy -- especially for clothes. But still I grinned. For I knew there was something in it for me, too. A lot, actually.
I was gathering credit points for a reward. And I collected them with a smile.
The reason for my smile was in the second cubicle from the left. She was the most beautiful woman I knew and she had done strange things to me. Right now, for example, she had reduced me to a teenage boy who imagined her standing half naked behind that flimsy curtain. And, as a teenage boy, I had had to rearrange the crotch of my pants, hoping that none of the women around me would notice what I had done.
Yes, I was in love all over again with the woman in cubicle two from the left. In fact, she was looking for a dress to wear tonight for when we would first go to the Met. Next we would have an intimate supper at our special Italian restaurant, after which we would walk over to our tiny piano bar and have our habitual nightcap-and-dance.
But tonight at supper I would present my love with a small but very expensive trinket in a velvet covered little box. So -- if all goes well and why shouldn't it? -- we might skip the piano bar and...
The images that colored my daydream tightened my pants even more. I sighed and tugged to erase the evidence. My eyes wandered around with embarrassment.
As they did, they got hooked to the gaze of a spectacular platinum blonde. Her eyes bored straight into mine. She smiled a dazzlingly white and red lipstick smile. My first reaction was to blush, feeling caught with tenting pants. But what I saw next undid all my careful rearrangements.
The big haired sex bomb stepped from behind the rack of clothes where she had been standing. First thing -- or rather things -- I saw were her breasts. They were huge and hardly held in check by her tight V-necked angora jersey. It had been tucked into an equally tight mini-skirt. She seemed to wear the skirt only to hug her hips and leave her endless legs free to play all the way down to a pair of towering heels.
Monroe, I thought, but taller. Mansfield -- ah no, sexier... she was just every wet dream the golden era of sex goddesses ever produced. And she brought it all over to me -- sashaying and smiling as if she knew me.
I rose to my feet.
"Bruce?" she asked in a cloud of perfume and sexy breathing. I then knew who she was. But I discarded the notion at once. It was just not possible.
"Yes," she said. "It's me."
I once more took her in -- the hair, the tits, the legs. The glossy, fat lips. And the cool, cool gray eyes, of course.
At that moment something red invaded the corner of my eyes. A tall, blonde woman had left cubicle two from the left. She wore a red velvet, floor length evening gown. It hugged her slim body, leaving her elegant neck, her fragile shoulders and delicate clavicles free.
A blonde Audrey Hepburn, I thought. No, spicier...Lauren Bacall. Yes, I know my classics. I turned around to admire her. She shifted her weight to one hip.
"Well, honey?" she said. "What do you think?"
I walked towards her. My head felt dizzy from overload. My hands cupped her face. My eyes caught her wide blue eyes. And I kissed her.
She gasped when I let her go.
"Oh my, Bruce," she panted. "What was that about?"
"I just had to, Rachel," I said.
She smiled -- a bit nervous it seemed.
"Who was that woman?" she asked.
I looked around. The goddess had gone -- like a mirage. My eyes wandered through the shop. I did not see her.
"Ah," I said. "Someone I thought I knew once."
"She looked...amazing."
"Yes," I said. "Amazing."
Then I turned back to her.
"Rachel? Will you marry me?"
***
The End.
long winding story that does engage you but the ending is like a tiny whimper that is disconnected for the story. it was going pretty well but the whole long play con escort mastermind angle was just beyond ridiculous
1-star. 10 chapters of excitement and build-up then the ending fell flat on its face. I mean a complete crash and burn from a writing standpoint. I guess the author got tired of their own bullshit and decided to pull the plug. This was a really disappointing way to end what could have been a great story.
A very strange story that admittedly works as a sort of psychological thriller. I was not a fan of the dénouement, but the exposition places this head and shoulders above typical LW fare.
I felt at times that Bruce’s involvement was more because he is our POV protagonist rather than being an integral part of the machinations. In fact, his involvement seemed to cause more issues than they solved for Erica.
I will say that your summation of the grotesque merger of Estelle and Myr was extremely insightful and clear writing. You cleared the muddy waters so effectively with that passage, I was blown away.
I’m not sure what to say beyond acknowledging and celebrating the writing ability presented and (mildly) criticize the plotting. Overall, it was wonderfully impressive.
Biggest pile of shit I have ever read not loving should be in 3 or 4 different categories my advice is get a proof reader and stop writing in the wrong sections there was nothing loving about any of this mhriam was fkd up and must have aids Erica was a lying sack off shit they both deserve each other and every disease there is
The concept was actually very nice, and all the mysteries around it
And yes, even in the end, where Erica ia the big bad wolf
But, then what's the point if this chapter
Because it terrible attempt to amend things
And thay final confrontation was supposed to be, "oh he's over her now"??
Such a shame indeed
Although would loved a happy ending
A darker one is better than this