All Comments on 'The Lawn Guy'

I would love a bit more of this one please.

Then you rushed it.

IMO, JJ/JR would not have cut out the employees from his wedding. They were at the heart of Crystal coming into the story.

1st 3 pages = 5*

2* for the last page, should have easily been 2-3 pages longer.

Mixed bag for me with this one. Nice story but you ruined it with Crystal as a character. She is basically a snob. When she thought he was a gardener she didn't want to know him, was rude to him, had no interest in him at all. Then suddenly she finds out he is the CEO and she always loved him, missed him so so much and always wanted to marry him! I call BS.

Would have been loads better if she would have started the relationship back up not caring he was the gardener, loving him for him. She and her mother just come across as shallow horrible people. He should have got a prenup.

I love a good romance but...

This isn't one. I love sappy Halmak movies and this one was to much for me. I can willingly suspend disbelief but this story was a bridge too far. I usually love the store but this one needed more fire, more anger to set the tone for passion which unfortunately it had none of.

Fun story, predictable though, but the ending was rushed... this deserves to be finished properly.

“I was a stupid twenty something. I'm really not like that.”

She’s not a twenty something now, and she treated him like crap because she thought he was the groundskeeper. Seems to me a leopard doesn’t change its spots.

It needs a couple more pages.

Stopped reading halfway through your writing is decently done but I cant stand the I got dumped but still would be with her trope especially after she snubs a "gardener" made me hate her character too much to keep reading.

Well written with real people actions and emotions. Would make a good Hallmark movie. Hope the newlyweds are comfortable in the RV during the Texas snowstorm.

Who refers to their daughter’s ex as a loser in a work setting? Then, when told she insulted JJ to his face, her reaction isn’t to be horrified or even embarrassed. Her reaction is “so what?” That’s not the kind of person who would immediately have a heart-to-heart with JJ. And the daughter doesn’t seem much better either.

Really enjoyed the story, loved the characters. I've certainly seen my fair share of parents just like Crystal's. The ending did seem pretty abrupt though, if you feel up to it I know I would certainly enjoy reading a part two.

The plot was trivial and poorly executed. The dialog was trite and everyone sounds like escapees from kindergarten. And this perhaps the first author I've read who managed to botch up two pronouns in the same sentence: "I owe she and I both that much" on page 2. It should be: " I owe her and me that much." The way to tell is to drop one of the pronouns and see if the sentence sounds right. "I owe she/her that much" Obviously it should be "her". or..."I owe me/I that much". Once again it obvious that it should be "me" (or myself in this construct). Lots of other errors, but the unlikelihood of two people in their 40's still being single and longing for each other so many years down the road is obvious. People do change and grow up and having more that just a little regret over what happened in college to two immature people is hard to imagine. (And you don't get to be a "billionaire" by being a sentimental softy.) I always say that this site is Fantasyland and anything the author wants to put in to satisfy his/her imagination is fine, but he/she has an audience to satisfy and in this case, this bit of the audience isn't. 2*

I liked this a lot. It's erotic fantasy for crying out loud, doesn't have to make sense, even if it's a bit mushy.

And thats what this is about. You brought a smile to my face for sure. I enjoyed the story . Thank you.

It was pleasant - but not much more.

There was no conflict; JR was too nice to Crystal's mother, too ready to reconnect with the girl who dumped him.

Awful. Just awful. And I just realized Overcritical already schooled the author on this. Enough said.

Kind of slow moving. Some of the dialogue was tedious, but the idea is good.

I am glad somebody else thought he should have got a pre nup. I hate that my first thought was which one of them would get control of the factory after the divorce. It would be a damn shame for 1 divorce to bankrupt a whole town and its citizens!

Damn!! I thought the Loving Wives category had a tough crowd of commenters in it. 😆 I thought your story was great. Thanks.

I enjoyed this for the most part since it had a nice concept, was fairly simple, and was a relaxed read. There was a good set-up and the parts tied together well, but the end was way too rushed.

One point that really conflicted in my mind was Crystal's reaction to seeing JJ/JR as the gardener and treating him so poorly, as if he wasn't a success because he was only a gardener. That seemed to differ with her later personality and how she presented herself during their all-too-quick romance.

A minor point was that Crystal's mom got off too easy, but it proved that JR was a truly nice guy rather than one who held grudges. However, I would have hoped that he'd have learned from his past mistake and taken his time rather than playing Romance Indy Car driver.

Finally, I was going to mention was a little grammatical error with a couple of pronouns but, fortunately, I read the other comments this time and see it's been covered in detail. Therefore, I'll add that, yes, there was an error but it wasn't the end of the world or worth points being knocked off in my mind.

I agree with Baldy74. You totally ignored her 2 year ENGAGEMENT to Chad. A one line explanation that he cheated and she never liked him anyway does nothing but raise red flags in my mind. Classic gold digger. Not much effort to portray ANY romance in my mind. You are way better than this story.

You made this ikd siftie tear up, We need a part two covering your wonder honeymoon and then a part 3 for your "family trip" to Florida followed by the birth of their first child....

I thought it was a cute story, fun to read and enjoyed it but then what do I know? Only what I like! If I didn't like it I wouldn't read it. Too many stories on this site to read something I don't like.

Cheers

SAGE

Beautiful story.

This is your best story.

Beautiful story! So glad the gentleman in JR could talk with Becky, given what she had done to them. And how kindly JR was to Crystal when she thought he was the lowly lawn guy! Glad to see they got together and reconnected so lovingly. Part 2 could provide more details! does he have a bit of manly hair for that muscular chest and those abs? He is very loving toward her, and she toward him. Anxious to read more about their sexual connections. Please write on!

So. When JJ was the impoverished Groundskeeper, Crystal's undying love for him suffered a set back!!! How her love showed, when she ran the "Gardener" out of the day care!! And Becky's contempt for the "Loser" took a radical 180 degree turn, for JJ the billionaire. What a pair of contemptible females. JR was an ass, for carrying a torch through the years, for such a one.

Unwilling to post the last comment? I've read it and it seems relevant.

Crystal and her mother were a pair of gold diggers. Had Crystal really loved JR back in college she would have talked to him about her mother and they could have worked something out. But she shows her true colors -twice - when she ran off thinking he was the gardener and then chased him off when he came by - again thinking he was the gardener and was below him. The RAAC was just unbelievable.

1 star

If Crystal was so in love with JJ, why did she have no time for JJ, the "Lawn Guy"? Then she runs him, the "Gardener", out of the Day Care Center. Funny kind of love. Becky was worse! She was happy to apologize to JJ the CEO/Owner and potential Son-In-Law and explain her part in Crystal's and his breakup. The rest of the story is sugar and spice! Well, some like it and some don't but it's the author's story!

You rushed the relationship. What happens next is she takes him for all the money he has in the divorce. Hate gold diggers... For example 50 Shades of Grey would be a different story if he was white trash and lived in a trailer instead of rich. She should love him for being who he was instead of for the money. Story was complete waste of time and I will not be posting any rating.

The true romantic story that JR finds the true love with other woman as Crystal and his employee is Crystal, who sees his happiness. That would have been interesting story end...............

Love the story. It deserves 5*****. AAAAA+++++

Very sweet…heck, this would make a good Hallmark movie premise…!!!

JR is just too nice, gullible and easily being run over to have achieved his position in life as a multi-billionaire. Other than that I agree with the anonymous comments "You rushed the relationship..." and "If Crystal is so in love with JJ ..." , no need to repeat it here.

Fun and funny. Gold digging after 10 years? How did JR/JJ succeed if he is this gullible? Oh; I see. He is desperate!!!

4*

BJ

Great story Doc

she didnt love when he was a lawn boy, she just after money

Got my doubts about Crystal. Too many negative indicators throughout.

Sheesh, people. Crys wasn't a golddigger. Her mom was, sand refused to pay for the rest of her education if she didn't date Chad. Do you folks even read?

Crystal dismissed him when she thought he was a groundskeeper. JR is too good for that gold digger.

Great story. I just wish it had a couple more chapters.

Well developed characters and plot in a short-story format. Nicely done!